Do you know your authentic self?
Who are you beyond all the conditioned beliefs you have learned over your lifetime?
Often studying a child can give you some valuable clues as to who you once were before the chaos, drama and hurt made you adapt and change to fit in. Notice a child with a giggle waiting to bubble out, a generous hug for someone they love. The generous last bite they share with their friend = dog. The running, jumping and playing because they just woke up. What better reason than that?
So what happened to us?
Marisa Peers teaches that a lot of what caused our fractured self – belief stems from someone, somewhere at some time telling us or acting as if we were not enough. It usually happens before the age of 7 but we are also bombarded with judgements and comparisons all day. “ Not thin enough. Bum not big enough. Not Zen enough and incredibly cannot fold body in pretzel formation on edge of mountain – while smiling”. You get the idea. Social media is not helping this situation either. We continually compare ourselves to others or a photoshopped illusion and feel “less than”.
The bruised self esteem makes us change to fit in. If you have to change yourself for one person or a group you will find yourself in a vicious cycle trying to please people in every new exchange you have. That’s a lot of people, a lot of changing and it is exhausting.
So don’t worry about the way you come across. Take note though – owning who you are does not excuse bad manners! Don’t judge yourself through others eyes as you will want to change to try fit into what you perceive they want you to be. Don’t believe that conditioning for a moment.
Get out some lipstick, a sharpie or whatever is around and write on every mirror “I am enough”. Tell yourself, tell your partner, tell you parents, kids, friends and tribe. Everyday. We are all enough.
Own who you are.
be-yourself. There is no one better at it than you.